Oye I’ve been particularly horrible at keeping up with this. I swear I didn’t forget, I just have been having some major writer’s block issues. As it stands this is my fourth attempt at a new post since my last one, and the really silly thing is that I’ve been sitting on this newest concept for a week! Which means I was just stuck in Lazytown for far too long, and since I promised to infuse pop culture into my next post it is perfect that I got this topic from a TV show. Last week on an episode of ‘New Girl’ they proposed the question “do you think if we met now we would still be friends?”, and it really got me to thinking of just how crucial it is that we meet the people in our lives when we do meet them.
Much like Jess and Cece from the show my best friend and I have been friends since we were pretty young. I was five and she was six when we met at her mom’s daycare, that’s 17 years! I am not even sure it was a question of if we would be friends, it just happened and we never looked back. It’s hard to think of a big life event or important memory that doesn’t have her in it, so to think of it being possible we wouldn’t be friends is pretty much impossible. Which is why when I applied the hypothetical of “if we met now instead of then would be still be friends?” I have to think so. I mean it would require us to meet incredibly randomly, or at some Harry Potter function, but I believe we could click and be friends. I mean it’s part of the beauty of our friendship; we balance each other incredibly well. It’s just…so difficult to try and picture because I think being friends with her has helped to shape me in subtle ways and so if she wasn’t there from the start maybe I wouldn’t be who I am today, and she wouldn’t be who she is and then maybe we wouldn’t be friends.
I mean I am by far not the same person I was when I met any of my friends. Not that I am a completely different person, but simply that I’ve grown and gotten a better handle on the things that define me and that I stand for and so on and so forth. Luckily I have been so fortunate to hold on to the friends I had growing up despite what society tells you about going to college and losing touch with them all. These crazy, amazing people have chosen to stick with me and I am beyond thankful for that. I think growing up in the environment we had helped that we have gone to school with each other since kindergarten till the day we graduated. I mean my graduating class was 88 and while I’ve heard of smaller it is still pretty incredible what that dynamic can do. For all the bitching I did about how small this town was and that there was nothing to do I have to admit it was a pretty great place to grow up and the people I did it with were just a bonus. Even the friends I made at college are people I think I’d still be friends with if I met them today and not four years ago or anywhere in between graduation. They might not have the history or strong connection that I have with my friends from high school but we have those years and those adventures to share. I don’t think I can think of a person in my arsenal of friends that if we met today we wouldn’t be capable of being friends like we are now.
Think about it though, the people you wouldn’t or couldn’t be friends with if you met them today are people you have already cut out of your life for whatever reason. Not all friendships get to be as awesome and long-lived as others but that doesn’t mean they weren’t important. There are people in my life who I am no longer in contact with, consider friends, or are people I consider more of acquaintances but I know that because I was at a time friends with them I’ve learned something and grew. Virtually each and every person we encounter in life leave some sort of lasting effect on us. Our lives would be different in some way had they not entered it, and that’s why there is such a crucial importance of time and place.
It almost sounds religious what I am trying to say but I think of it as more of a Universe thing. We make friends with certain people because we meet them at the right time and/or place. I met Steph when I was five and just getting ready to start school, she was my only friend the day I walked in the building and it was vital I had that support to be fearless in the way of meeting other kids and finding out who else could be my friend. I met Lindsay when we were in third grade and had I never met her I wouldn’t have someone who appreciates musicals and theater in the way I do. I met Natalie in seventh grade and without her I wouldn’t have someone who will sit up till late hours talking about anything and everything. I met Kinsey freshman year of college and without her I wouldn’t have a person to go on insane road trips with. And those are just a few of the incredible friends I have in my life and they are so incredible because I met them at the right times and formed bonds that now can’t be broken by silly hypothetical questions.
Being an only child my friends mean pretty much the world to me and are my family in some senses, I don’t know what I would do without them…or even who I might be. And I know I am still young and will continue to meet people who will become friends but those people will all come into my life at the appropriate times and begin to carve their places. So I guess it is pointless to sit and ponder about meeting now & capable of being friends because meeting them when you did helped create the person you are now, which determines the likely hood of being friends if met today. Like they realized on the show all that really matters is that we are friends now and to appreciate that fact and understand the Universe put these people in our lives when it did because it was right, part of the importance of time and place.