Living Just to Find Emotion

First of all. Hi. It’ s a bit and I know last year I said ‘it’s so strange to go from posting every day to almost radio silence’ and while I am repeating myself it is still true. Granted I feel I am a bit busier this year so it feels less alien but none the less when I realized it had been twenty days since a post I dropped my jaw a little bit. Anyways this post is actually not about NaNoWriMo or anything writing related but a quick update; I have past the half way mark of 25,000 words the other day and it still puts me a bit behind schedule (not to mention I am not loving most of what I am coming up with) but it still feels good and gives me more hope for finishing with 50,000 words and at least a basic story I can revise at a latter date. If y’all are participating I hope you are doing good and feeling good about it too!

Now on to the actual reason. If you follow me on any sort of social media (Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr) you know that this last weekend I went to a Teen Wolf convention in New Jersey called Howlercon. It was a truly magical experience that I will recap much better hopefully within the next week, but for now I want to share just a moment from the weekend that left an impact. During one of the panels, which featured all the male actors attending the event, a fan asked “If a song would play any time you entered a room what would it be?”. While the others answered Orny Adams queued up ‘Don’t Stop Believing’ by Journey on his phone and let it play into his mic.

Without hesitation all of us in the audience started to sing along with the song as he let it play. Immediately the guys on the stage were impressed and it continued for about half the song. It’s just one of those really random moments that ends up being an example of how unique and unifying fandom can be. I’ll attach the video below that was put together to showcase the moment because it is rad as hell and I am really happy they got a video put together so quickly to share with everyone.

To be apart of an event like that in general would be so cool and a pretty awesome story to tell others. However for me it was like a sign telling me that this was meant to be. For years I’ve associated ‘Don’t Stop Believing’ as this positive force in my life, it pops up and tells  me when truly positive and meaningful things are becoming apart of my story. It’s a song I connect to one of my best friends because we both love it and attached ourselves and our friendship too it. It is a song that was heavy in the early years of Glee which is a show that I might not love as much as I did then but it definitely left a mark on me. It’s a song I associate with a season of American Idol I watched and found new artists I still love (Kris Allen, Adam Lambert, Allison Iraheta, etc) but also some really great friends I gained from the experience of that fandom. It is just a song that tugs at my heart, it creates a new little space for this new moment or show or person because it’s there forever now.

So getting to sing along with that room of fans who love and are as passionate about this show and these actors as I am, as well as later that night at our black light party, it really solidifies that choosing to watch Teen Wolf those months after I graduated college and had no idea what was next was a fantastic life choice. It says that to return to a dedication for a show I hadn’t had in a few years, to involve myself again in fandom, to invest myself in characters and actors was all something I was meant to do. No matter what shame people think I should carry for being this active of a fan or this into a show meant for “tweens” about werewolves this let me know that is all nonsense and I am doing exactly what I should be.

And with that I share the video and go to finish ugly crying about all the fantastic memories I have from the weekend coping (yes still) with the fact it is all over. I’ll be back with more, cause these feelings are jut the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the roller coaster I rode,later  and probably a donation for the month too. Until then, don’t stop believing. :)



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